The winds of change

I can feel it. I can touch it. But I'm not sure I like it. It's all very odd. So much has changed this year and yet in some ways nothing has changed at all. There is so much going on in my head right now I just have to write it out. So, what's on my mind? Well, nothing seems to be falling into place. I also seem to be resisting a hell of a lot. Is such fear normal or is it indicative that it's just not right? I sort of feel like I'm treading water even though life is rushing and crashing over me at every turn, at a rate of knots. I'm not married, I have no children, I'm now 30 (did I mention that?!), I don't own a home. In many ways, nothing momentous is happening in my life at all at a time when everyone seems to be getting married, having babies, buying a home. I can't help feel just a little bit angry. But angry about what? I have my health, I have fantastic friends, I have family, I have a roof over my head. As Nina Simone said, I got life. So why isn't that enough?

Wot I've learnt

Now I'm the grand old age of 30, I wondered what I actually have learnt over these years - so here's a small selection...

1. Eat breakfast
2. Always carry a spare pair of contact lenses in your handbag
3. Carry an umbrella even if it's summer
4. Don't go running after a mugger in flip flops - you will never catch him up
5. Don't trust a man who woos you with expensive flowers and charming words
6. Keep your wits, your head & your sense of humour
7. Stay close to your girlies
8. Even if everyone is standing up on a train, there is usually a window seat to be found somewhere in the carriage
9. Always carry a notepad - you never know when inspiration will hit
10. Dance
11. Use contraception
12. Secrets and lies will always come out - no matter how hard you try to conceal them
13. Be truthful. To yourself and others
14. Take a risk. Go on...
15. Take time to be by yourself
16. Falling in love is easy but breaking up is hard to do
17. Look up at the sky and look at the stars
18. Keep your phone battery charged
19. Carry a camera with you - see no.9
20. Look at the architecture above your head
21. Never, ever, give your power away. To anyone
22. Wear a good bra
23. Smile at strangers
24. Take responsibility for yourself
25. Be wary of men who put you on a pedestal - you're only going to fall off
26. Have a good belly laugh - it will make you feel better
27. You can only love someone else if you love yourself - irritating cliche but true
28. The mind and body are inextricably linked
29. Women need to stop competing against each other but join forces
30. There is always hope

Brave new world

Well, this is it. The first post. I've been umming and aaahing over this for a while but there comes a time when you just think oh, sod it. I've never been one to not say what I think or share my views, so why start now? Many of my friends know that I have been a secret scribbler for many years ie writing in private but too scared to say I'm a writer, I enjoy being creative. But as this year has been a year of transition and time to try new things, to begin again, what better year to do this one thing for myself. So here we are. I've outted myself. And I ain't going back into the closet.